Terrible Tavern Menu
Burgers & Sandwiches
Terrible Burger
A basic beef patty topped with a slice of American cheese, wilted lettuce, a sad tomato slice, and a dollop of mayo, all served on a stale hamburger bun. Comes with a side of soggy fries.
$8.99
Sad Sandwich
Your choice of deli meat (ham, turkey, or roast beef) served on white bread with a single wilted lettuce leaf and a smear of mayo. Served with a side of potato chips that are probably stale.
$7.99
Grilled Cheese Disaster
wo slices of American cheese melted between two pieces of white bread. Served with a side of ketchup for dipping, because why not?
$6.99
Desserts
Store-Bought Brownie
A pre-packaged brownie that's been sitting on the shelf for who knows how long. Served with a dollop of canned whipped cream.
$3.99
Sad Scoop of Ice Cream
A single scoop of generic vanilla ice cream served in a plastic bowl. No toppings, no frills, just sadness.
$2.99
Stale Cookies
A plate of cookies that may or may not have been baked this week. Served with a glass of lukewarm milk for dipping
$4.99
Appetizers
Greasy Onion Rings
Deep-fried onion rings coated in a crispy batter, served with a side of tangy ketchup. A guilty pleasure that's sure to satisfy your craving for something crispy and indulgent.
$4.99
Stale Pretzel Bites
Hard and chewy pretzel bites served with a side of mustard for dipping. Perfect for munching on while you wait for your main course...or not.
$3.99
Mystery Meat Sampler
A selection of unidentified fried meats served with a mystery dipping sauce. Can you guess what's on your plate? It's a culinary adventure you won't soon forget...or maybe you will.
$6.99
Pub Grub
Microwaved Mac & Cheese
A bowl of rubbery macaroni drowned in neon-orange cheese sauce. Served with a side of regret.
$5.99
Frozen Chicken Tenders
Crispy chicken tenders straight from the freezer to your plate. Served with a side of freezer-burned fries and your choice of dipping sauce (if we have any left)
$6.99
Microwaved Pizza Pockets
Hot pockets filled with questionable meat and cheese, microwaved to perfection (or not). Served with a side of despair.
$4.99
Drinks
Watered-Down Well Drinks
Your choice of well liquor diluted with water and served over ice. Because we're classy like that.
$5.99
Flat Beer
A lukewarm can of beer that's been sitting in the back of the fridge for who knows how long. Served with a side of regret.
$3.99
Bottomless Soda Fountain
Enjoy unlimited refills of our selection of sodas, which may or may not be flat.
$2.99
Please note: Prices and menu items are subject to change...for the worse. Join us at the Terrible Tavern for a dining experience you won't soon forget (unfortunately).
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